One of the most common leadership mistakes is attempting to solve a problem before it’s clearly defined—or worse, solving the wrong problem altogether. Effective coaching and transformational leadership require us to slow down, clarify, and then engage others in full ownership of both the issue and its resolution.

In this article, we explore Skill 27: Problem Specification and Skill 28: Problem Ownership—two essential steps that move individuals from insight to responsibility and action.

Skill 27: Problem Specification

Definition: Identify and define correctly the nature, cause(s), and implications of a given problem to be able to effectively problem-solve.

Once a challenge has been explored, it’s time to help the individual move from general confusion to specific clarity. Problem Specification is about accurately identifying what the real issue is, where it stems from, who is involved, and why it matters.

Leaders often make assumptions or accept vague language (“I’m overwhelmed,” “It’s just not working”) without pressing further. Problem specification demands precision.

Why It Matters

Clarity is power. Without a clear definition of the problem, coaching conversations become circular, solutions are ineffective, and progress stalls. But when someone can name the real issue—without exaggeration, blame, or distortion—solutions become obvious and actionable.

A well-specified problem also allows for appropriate prioritization and strategy alignment.

How to Implement

• Encourage specificity: Ask questions like “What exactly is happening?” “When does it happen?” “Who is involved?” “What are the consequences if this continues?”
• Use structured tools: Encourage frameworks like SWOT (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, Threats), cause-and-effect diagrams, or flowcharts to break down complex issues.
• Distinguish symptoms from root causes: Ensure the stated problem is not merely a surface-level symptom. Use earlier exploration work (Skill 26) to cross-reference deeper factors.
• Clarify what’s at stake: Help the individual articulate why this matters—what’s being lost, delayed, or compromised.

Practice Exercise

Problem Precision Drill: Invite the coachee to write down their challenge in one sentence. Then ask them to revise it three times, each time making it more specific and measurable. This develops clarity and insight.

Authors Note: Years ago when I was the number one sales rep for a national company then my sales performance dropped steeply. The sales manager could have assumed what was contributing to my decline and told me to smarten up and get back to selling, but that would not have worked! Why? Because the reason for my collapse was personal after my separation with my fiancée. The point being it is VERY important to confirm the real reason for an issue or a problem – don’t make assumptions!

Authors Note: One personal example was years ago when I was a sales rep for a national company my performance was number one in the company but it dropped steeply. The sales manager could have assumed what was contributing to the situation and told me to smarten up and get back to selling but that would not have worked because the reason for my decline was personal after the separation with my fiancée. It is VERY important to get the real reason for an issue or a problem.

Skill 28: Problem Ownership

Definition: Willing to take responsibility for your own actions and outcomes, and able to help others do the same.

Now that the problem is clear, the transformational leader must guide the individual toward ownership. This is where accountability is born—not from blame, but from personal agency. It’s the shift from “This is happening to me” to “I have a role in this, and I can change it.”

Ownership is not about fault—it’s about power. Only when a person owns the problem can they own the solution.

Why It Matters

Lack of ownership leads to passivity, deflection, and stagnation. In contrast, when individuals accept responsibility for their part in the challenge, they become empowered to take meaningful action. Leaders who foster ownership build cultures of integrity, initiative, and resilience.

This skill is especially important in supervisory or coaching relationships where growth and accountability are the objectives.

How to Implement

• Ask responsibility-based questions: “What part of this do you control?” “What choices led to this point?” “What can you do differently moving forward?”
• Model vulnerability: Share your own moments of growth where ownership made a difference.
• Distinguish between fault and responsibility: Help others see that even if they didn’t cause the problem, they can choose how to respond to it.
• Set ownership expectations: Make it clear that without ownership, forward momentum will be limited.

Practice Exercise

Responsibility Mapping: Have the individual list all the factors influencing the problem. Next to each, have them rate how much control or influence they have over it (low, medium, high). Then focus the conversation only on those in the medium or high category. This shifts the energy to what they can do.

From Awareness to Action

With Problem Specification, the individual becomes clear about what they’re facing. With Problem Ownership, they become empowered to change it. These two skills work together to transition from exploration to action—anchoring growth in clarity and accountability.

As a transformational leader, when you help others see their situation clearly and own their path forward, you unlock the power of internal motivation and resilience.

Next, we’ll explore Skill 29: Goal-Setting and Skill 30: Goal Ownership—where clarity and accountability turn into inspiring, forward-focused action.

Until next time, Keep Living On Purpose!

PS. Stay tuned to your opportunity to pre-register for the Online Transformational Leadership Course. That link will be available soon. To bench your (or others) leadership skills, access our Leadership Skills Inventory-Self or LSI-360′.

The post Transformational Leadership Series From Clarity to Commitment: Empowering Others to Own Their Growth first appeared on CRG - Consulting Resource Group.

Empathy and Exploration: Unlocking Growth Through Deeper Connection
Skills 25 & 26: Advanced Empathy & Problem Exploration

In the fast-paced and high-pressure environments we lead in today, leaders often default to efficiency over empathy, solutions over listening. But transformational leaders understand a deeper truth: meaningful growth—whether in individuals, teams, or organizations—requires meaningful connection. In this article, we explore Skill 25: Advanced Empathy and Skill 26: Problem Exploration—two foundational competencies that allow leaders to coach others effectively by building trust and uncovering what truly needs to be addressed.

Skill 25: Advanced Empathy

Definition: Demonstrate accurate understanding of deeper feelings and thoughts in order to connect with others emotionally.

At the core of every effective coaching or problem-solving conversation is one essential skill: advanced empathy. Unlike surface-level sympathy or vague understanding, advanced empathy is about truly feeling with another person. It’s about naming the emotions beneath the surface, showing them you not only hear their words, but understand their inner experience.

Transformational leaders use advanced empathy to break down walls of resistance. When a person feels seen and understood at a deeper level, defensiveness melts and openness begins. This is where real growth can happen.

Why It Matters

According to Daniel Goleman’s research on Emotional Intelligence, empathy is one of the five key components of effective leadership. Teams with empathetic leaders experience higher engagement, retention, and performance. But advanced empathy takes this even further—requiring presence, intuition, and the courage to reflect what others may not yet be able to articulate.

How to Implement

• Slow down: Empathy is not rushed. Tune into both what’s being said and what’s not being said.
• Reflect back deeper meaning: “It sounds like underneath your frustration, there’s a sense of disappointment. Is that right?”
• Practice emotional vocabulary: Expand your emotional language to better name the complex feelings others express.
• Be fully present: Eliminate distractions and give the person your full attention—body, mind, and heart.

Practice Exercise

Model & Reflect: Practice a 10-minute conversation where your only goal is to reflect what the other person is feeling—without offering advice or shifting focus. Afterward, ask: “Did you feel understood?” Use their feedback to improve your clarity and presence.

Skill 26: Problem Exploration

Definition: Able to guide (facilitate) others through a process that enables them to identify the internal root cause(s) of their external (observed) problems, and/or issues preventing them from achieving their full potential.

Once emotional trust is built through advanced empathy, the next step in the coaching journey is effective problem exploration. Most people present symptoms, not root causes. As a transformational leader, your role is to gently guide others to look beneath the surface and explore what’s really driving their challenges.

This isn’t about interrogating or solving the problem for them—it’s about facilitating their insight.

Why It Matters

Leaders who skip the exploration phase and rush to solutions often find the same issues resurfacing later. Real transformation happens when individuals take ownership of the true source of their blocks—be it fear, mindset, unresolved conflict, or misalignment with values or purpose.

Problem exploration builds the foundation for sustainable change and personal responsibility.

How to Implement

• Use powerful, open-ended questions: “What do you believe is at the heart of this challenge?” or “How long has this been an issue for you?”
• Listen for patterns: Is this a recurring theme? A repeated frustration? What beliefs may be fueling it?
• Hold the silence: Sometimes, insight needs space. Don’t rush to fill the quiet.
• Encourage self-assessment: Ask the individual to reflect on internal factors (habits, fears, assumptions) that may be contributing to the external problem.

Practice Exercise

Guided Root-Cause Discovery: Use the “5 Whys” technique in a conversation. Ask “Why is this a problem?” then repeat the “why” question up to five times based on each previous answer. Debrief together to see what new insights emerge.

Bringing It Together

Skills 25 and 26 work in powerful tandem. Empathy builds the connection. Exploration facilitates the transformation. One without the other is incomplete. But together, they unlock trust, insight, and ownership—three pillars of lasting change.

As a transformational leader, your ability to master these coaching skills will elevate every conversation you have, every individual you guide, and every challenge you face with your team.

Next up, we’ll explore Skill 27: Problem Specification and Skill 28: Problem Ownership—turning clarity and responsibility into forward momentum.

Until next time, Keep Living On Purpose!

PS. Stay tuned to your opportunity to pre-register for the Online Transformational Leadership Course. That link will be available soon. To bench your (or others) leadership skills, access our Leadership Skills Inventory-Self or LSI-360′.

The post Transformational Leadership Series Section Three: Coaching, Counselling & Problem Management Skills first appeared on CRG - Consulting Resource Group.

Congratulations on reaching the final article in Section Two: Interpersonal Communication Skills of the Transformational Leadership Series. You’ve built a foundation of trust, empathy, presence, and clarity. Now we conclude this section by stepping into one of the most misunderstood—and most powerful—responsibilities of a transformational leader: catalyzing growth in others through courageous communication.

In this article, we’ll explore:

• Skill 23: Confrontation — I provide constructive feedback, guidance, and positive support when addressing issues or concerns, promoting growth and development in others.
• Skill 24: Challenging — I encourage and assist others in recognizing their strengths and opportunities to capitalize on their unrealized potential, guiding them toward positive changes.

These are not combative skills—they are developmental tools rooted in care, truth, and accountability.

Skill 23: Confrontation — Speaking the Truth with Support and Strength

What This Means

Confrontation, when done well, is not about conflict—it’s about clarity and care. It’s the willingness to address issues, behaviors, or concerns directly, with the goal of promoting awareness, correction, and growth.

Transformational leaders confront not to criticize, but to coach. They speak truth wrapped in support. They confront with the intention to build up, not tear down.

True confrontation says, “I care too much to stay silent.”

Why It Matters

Avoiding confrontation leads to unresolved tension, poor performance, and broken trust. But when done well, confrontation:

• Clarifies expectations and boundaries
• Builds a culture of honesty and responsibility
• Demonstrates courage and integrity in leadership

The absence of confrontation is not kindness—it’s neglect. Growth requires truth.

How to Implement

1. Check Your Motive: Ask yourself, “Am I confronting to help this person grow—or to release my frustration?”
2. Lead with Care, Not Criticism: Start with a commitment to the relationship: “I want to have an honest conversation because I care about your success.”
3. Be Specific and Solution-Oriented: Don’t generalize. Point to specific behaviors and offer a clear path forward.
4. Maintain a Calm, Respectful Tone: Your demeanor should communicate support, not aggression.
5. Follow Through: Don’t drop the issue after the confrontation. Offer support and accountability as the person grows.

Leaders who confront with courage and kindness build teams marked by trust, clarity, and forward movement.

Author Note: Many leaders fail to confront unacceptable conduct and through this sin of omission they have condoned or endorsed the conduct.

Skill 24: Challenging — Calling Out Potential with Purpose

What This Means

Challenging is the forward-focused complement to confrontation. While confrontation addresses what needs to change, challenging inspires someone toward what they can become. It’s about seeing more in someone than they currently see in themselves—and boldly calling it out.

This is not about pushing people past their limits. It’s about believing in their potential and inviting them to rise.

Transformational leaders are opportunity-spotters. They say, “I see something in you—and I believe it’s time for you to grow into it.”

Why It Matters

People often settle for less than their potential simply because no one ever challenged them to more.

When leaders challenge wisely:

• They activate confidence and ambition in others
• They create growth cultures, not comfort zones
• They multiply leadership and talent across the organization

Challenging isn’t pressure—it’s permission to grow.

How to Implement

1. Identify Hidden Potential: Look for strengths, talents, or traits that the person may not fully see or own.
2. Frame the Challenge as an Opportunity: Say, “I believe you’re ready for something bigger.” Paint a compelling picture of what’s possible.
3. Balance Encouragement with Expectation: Don’t coddle, but don’t condemn. Be supportive and clear.
4. Provide a Next Step: Challenges without pathways create overwhelm. Show them how to begin the stretch.
5. Stay Involved: Offer coaching, feedback, and accountability as they step forward.

When you challenge others with belief and clarity, you elevate not just performance—you elevate people.

Final Thoughts: Truth + Vision = Growth

Confrontation and challenging are not about control—they’re about calling others to growth through truth and belief. When done well, they help you:
✔ Strengthen accountability without diminishing dignity
✔ Multiply the growth capacity of your team
✔ Build a culture where people are stretched and supported

And that brings us to the end of Section Two: Interpersonal Communication Skills.

From self-disclosure to challenging, you’ve now developed the core interpersonal tools needed to build relationships of trust, influence, and transformation.

All of these skills are outlined in our Transformational Leadership Online Course look forward to many of you joining us.

Until next time, Keep Living On Purpose!

PS. Stay tuned to your opportunity to pre-register for the Online Transformational Leadership Course. That link will be available soon. To bench your (or others) leadership skills, access our Leadership Skills Inventory-Self or LSI-360′.

The post Transformational Leadership Series: Section Two — Interpersonal Communication Skills first appeared on CRG - Consulting Resource Group.

Welcome back to Section Two of the Transformational Leadership Series. As we near the conclusion of this section on Interpersonal Communication Skills, we now turn to two skills that define the heart of mature, effective leadership communication:

• Skill 21: Responding — I accurately convey my understanding of others’ feelings and circumstances, providing appropriate responses that demonstrate empathy and support.
• Skill 22: Assertiveness — I express myself honestly and kindly, avoiding the use of “put-downs,” while asserting my needs, opinions, and boundaries in a respectful manner.

If previous skills were about listening and observing, these next two are about what you say and how you say it—with empathy and clarity.

Skill 21: Responding — Leading with Empathy and Understanding

What This Means

Responding is more than just offering a reply—it’s the intentional act of letting someone know they’ve been heard, understood, and valued. It’s the bridge between listening and action.

Effective responding involves acknowledging both the content of what someone has said and the emotion behind it. It demonstrates not only that you were paying attention, but also that you care.

Responding is a leadership behavior that builds emotional safety and invites continued openness.

Why It Matters

When people don’t feel heard, they shut down. But when leaders respond with accuracy and empathy, they:

• Build stronger relationships
• Resolve conflict more effectively
• Foster a team culture of trust and openness

Good listening without good responding is incomplete. It’s your response that signals how much the other person truly matters to you.

How to Implement

1. Acknowledge Both Feelings and Facts: Respond with statements like, “It sounds like you’re frustrated with how that was handled—I appreciate you bringing it up.”
2. Avoid Premature Fixing: Let people finish before offering solutions. Often, they need empathy more than answers.
3. Match Tone to Context: Be warm, calm, and engaged—tone matters as much as content.
4. Practice Reflective Responses: “So what I’m hearing is…” or “It seems like what’s really important to you is…”
5. Validate Experience, Even if You Disagree: You can empathize with how someone feels without agreeing with their interpretation.

When your response shows that you truly understand, people begin to trust—and transformation becomes possible.

Skill 22: Assertiveness — Speak with Clarity, Lead with Respect

What This Means

Assertiveness is the ability to express yourself honestly and respectfully, without aggression, apology, or passive avoidance. It means owning your thoughts, feelings, and needs—and communicating them in a way that maintains both dignity and connection.

Assertiveness is not about dominance. It’s about clarity, courage, and mutual respect. It’s the confident middle ground between passivity and aggression.

Why It Matters

Leaders who lack assertiveness:

• Avoid tough conversations
• Harbor unresolved tension
• Struggle to set boundaries and maintain respect

Leaders who are overly aggressive:

• Create fear
• Damage relationships
• Undermine trust

Assertive leaders, however:

• Model respectful communication
• Foster a culture of honesty and accountability
• Establish healthy boundaries without blame or drama

Assertiveness is the secret sauce of courageous conversations.

How to Implement

1. Use “I” Statements: Speak from your own perspective. For example, “I feel concerned when deadlines are missed,” instead of “You always drop the ball.”
2. Practice Clear Boundaries: “I’m available to discuss this until 4 p.m.” is more powerful than vague openness.
3. Stay Calm and Respectful: Even when addressing conflict, remain composed and kind.
4. Don’t Apologize for Taking Space: Being direct doesn’t require being defensive.
5. Model the Behavior You Expect: If you want open, respectful dialogue, you must lead with it.

Assertiveness communicates: “I respect myself, and I respect you.” And that’s the hallmark of transformational leadership.

Author’s Note: A person has a natural assertiveness level which is highly impacted by their Personality and we recommend you complete the Personal Style Indicator to reveal your natural assertiveness levels. However, we are complex beings and many factors contribute to our ability to speak up. Personally, I grew up in a home where there was a lot of conflict. We survived as kids by being invisible. Later in life, as an adult there were many situations – mostly family related – where I had to learn how to be assertive and we encourage that you check in on your levels as well.

Final Thoughts: Connect Deeply, Speak Boldly

Responding and assertiveness are complementary leadership skills. Together, they allow you to:
✔ Respond to others with empathy and accuracy
✔ Express yourself with clarity and confidence
✔ Build a culture of trust, honesty, and healthy dialogue

In our final article for this section, we’ll conclude with:

• Skill 23: Confrontation
• Skill 24: Challenging

These final interpersonal skills are about providing feedback, support, and guidance that inspire real growth.

You’re building leadership that both listens and speaks with purpose.

Until next time, Keep Living On Purpose!

PS. Stay tuned to your opportunity to pre-register for the Online Transformational Leadership Course. That link will be available soon. To bench your (or others) leadership skills, access our Leadership Skills Inventory-Self or LSI-360′.

The post Transformational Leadership Series: Section Two — Interpersonal Communication Skills first appeared on CRG - Consulting Resource Group.

Welcome back to Section Two: Interpersonal Communication Skills in the Transformational Leadership Series. As we continue building your communication mastery, we now turn to two of the most underestimated—but absolutely essential—skills in leadership: questioning and listening.

In an age of noise, people are hungry to be heard. Leaders who ask with intention and listen with depth create spaces of trust, insight, and growth.

In this article, we’ll explore:

• Skill 19: Questioning — I effectively use questions to elicit information and gain insight, demonstrating a balance between using inquiries to gather necessary information and avoiding overuse that may hinder open communication.
• Skill 20: Listening — I actively listen to others, focusing on understanding the meaning they intend to convey while avoiding preconceptions and distractions.

These two are foundational to coaching, collaboration, conflict resolution, and influence. They are the gateway to connection.

Skill 19: Questioning — Ask to Understand, Not to Interrogate

What This Means

Questioning, when done well, is a leadership superpower. It’s the ability to draw out thoughts, feelings, and ideas through skillful, respectful inquiry. It’s not about interrogation—it’s about invitation.

Gerard Egan, in his landmark book The Skilled Helper, teaches that questions are essential tools for understanding, clarifying, and helping others find their own solutions. He emphasizes that questions should always serve the other person’s growth—not just the leader’s agenda.

Great questions unlock clarity. They invite ownership. They shift people from confusion to direction.

Why It Matters

The quality of your questions often determines the quality of your leadership conversations.

Leaders who ask well:

• Encourage reflection and self-awareness
• Create safe space for others to contribute
• Avoid assumptions and uncover deeper insights

On the other hand, over-questioning or poorly timed inquiries can feel invasive, disempowering, or manipulative. Balance is key.

How to Implement

1. Use Open-Ended Questions: Start with “What,” “How,” or “Tell me about…” to encourage exploration.
2. Avoid Rapid-Fire Inquiries: Too many questions too fast can feel interrogative. Let people breathe and reflect.
3. Match Questions to the Moment: Consider timing and tone. Some questions are better saved for private, reflective moments.
4. Follow Up Thoughtfully: Use what Egan calls “probing gently”—build on what others share without steering too aggressively.
5. Let Silence Do Its Work: After a good question, pause. Give the other person time to think and speak.

Authors Note: Avoid the use of “WHY” when asking questions. This word has loaded judgement behind it. In my coaching certification it was the one word that if we used it frequently or often, (during our certification) that a person would fail. Think about it for a minute how often do you use “Why”?

When you question with wisdom, people feel respected, not examined—and they open up as a result.

Skill 20: Listening — Hear Beyond the Words

What This Means

Listening is not just hearing—it’s understanding the full message someone is trying to convey, including what they may not be saying directly. It means listening not just to reply, but to understand.

In our Transformational Leadership Online Course, we outline three levels of listening:

1. Hearing words
2. Understanding meaning
3. Sensing feelings and intentions behind the message

Transformational leaders practice all three. They don’t interrupt, assume, or drift. They lean in and stay fully present.

Why It Matters

Listening is one of the deepest forms of respect. When people feel truly heard, they:

• Trust more deeply
• Share more openly
• Feel valued and understood

And that creates a leadership environment where growth and collaboration flourish.

How to Implement

1. Be Fully Present: Eliminate distractions. Listening is a discipline of focus.
2. Reflect and Clarify: Repeat key points in your own words to confirm your understanding.
3. Watch for Nonverbal Cues: People communicate with tone, body language, and facial expressions—don’t miss them.
4. Validate the Speaker: Show empathy. Let them know their perspective matters.
5. Avoid the Urge to Fix: Often, people aren’t asking for solutions—they just want to be heard.

Great leaders know that sometimes, listening is the most powerful contribution they can make in a moment.

Final Thoughts: Conversations That Transform

Questioning and listening are the essence of transformational leadership conversations. They allow you to:
Understand others with greater clarity
Build deeper trust and engagement
Empower people to grow through insight, not instruction

As Gerard Egan teaches, when leaders ask well and listen deeply, they don’t just manage others—they help them develop and thrive.

In our next article, we’ll look at how to bring all this together with:

• Skill 21: Responding
• Skill 22: Assertiveness

You’re shaping a leadership style that’s not just effective—it’s deeply human. Keep going.

Until next time, Keep Living On Purpose!

PS. Stay tuned to your opportunity to pre-register for the Online Transformational Leadership Course. That link will be available soon. To bench your (or others) leadership skills, access our Leadership Skills Inventory-Self or LSI-360′.

The post Transformational Leadership Series: Section Two — Interpersonal Communication Skills first appeared on CRG - Consulting Resource Group.

Welcome back to Section Two: Interpersonal Communication Skills in our Transformational Leadership Series. As we continue to build your leadership toolkit, we now focus on two essential skills that help you see people more accurately and respond with greater wisdom.

Too often, leaders react to assumptions rather than reality—creating conflict, confusion, or missed opportunities. That’s where today’s skills come in. They help you move from automatic reactions to intentional leadership.

In this article, we focus on:

• Skill 17: Observing — I objectively check my perceptions, avoiding distortions or judgments, and strive to accurately understand others’ behaviors and intentions.
• Skill 18: Suspending — I exercise wisdom by withholding emotions, judgments, and premature advice, allowing for a thoughtful and unbiased understanding of the situation before responding.

Let’s explore how you can lead more effectively by first slowing down and seeing clearly.

Skill 17: Observing — Leadership Begins with Accurate Perception

What This Means

Observing is the ability to see and hear what is actually happening, rather than letting your emotions, assumptions, or past experiences distort the moment. It’s about checking your perceptions and remaining open to what’s real—not just what you expect to see.

In leadership, this means noticing tone, body language, patterns of behavior, and subtle cues. Observing helps you decode what people are really communicating, even when they aren’t saying it outright.

Why It Matters

Assumptions destroy trust. When you observe instead of assume, you:

• Make more informed decisions
• Reduce misunderstandings and conflict
• Strengthen relationships through accurate empathy

Great leaders are great observers. They don’t rush to conclusions—they read the room with clarity.

How to Implement

1. Slow Down and Pay Attention: Don’t just listen—watch. Observe tone, facial expressions, posture, and pacing.
2. Ask Yourself: “What’s Really Happening Here?” Suspend judgment long enough to question your initial interpretation.
3. Use Silence: Let pauses help you gather data before reacting.
4. Confirm with Curiosity: Ask clarifying questions like, “I noticed you paused just now—was something on your mind?”
5. Practice in Every Interaction: Observation is a muscle. Strengthen it in conversations, meetings, and everyday moments.

When you observe with intention, you lead with greater insight—and others feel seen and understood.

Skill 18: Suspending — The Leadership Power of Holding Back

What This Means

Suspending is the ability to withhold your reactions, assumptions, and advice long enough to gain full understanding. It’s the pause that creates space for wisdom.

This is not about avoidance or passivity—it’s about choosing restraint over reaction. It means pressing pause on your emotions and interpretations to allow thoughtful, respectful engagement.

One of the most effective tools to support this skill is the Personal Style Indicator (PSI). Understanding both your own style and the styles of others helps you suspend quick judgments and respond with empathy and insight instead of irritation or bias.

Why It Matters

Most people don’t listen—they reload. Leaders who react too quickly often miss what’s really going on or escalate situations unnecessarily.

Suspending helps you:

• Avoid misjudging intentions
• De-escalate emotional tension
• Strengthen your credibility through thoughtful responses

And when combined with personal style knowledge from the PSI, you gain clarity about why others communicate the way they do, reducing misinterpretations and improving relationships.

How to Implement

1. Learn Your Style Using the Personal Style Indicator (PSI): This assessment is a foundational tool for understanding your own tendencies and the tendencies of others.
2. Recognize When Emotion Rises: Notice the urge to interrupt, fix, or react. That’s your cue to suspend.
3. Breathe Before You Respond: A deep breath gives your brain time to shift from reactivity to reflection.
4. Remind Yourself: “There’s More to the Story.” People behave for reasons you may not yet understand.
5. Choose Curiosity Over Control: Ask questions instead of jumping in with solutions or corrections.

The ability to suspend doesn’t make you weak—it makes you strategic, grounded, and deeply respectful.

Final Thoughts: Leadership That Listens, Learns, and Leads Wisely

Observation and suspension are the twin disciplines of thoughtful leadership. They allow you to:
✔ See people and situations accurately
✔ Pause before reacting, which preserves relationships
✔ Lead with emotional intelligence, not just authority

And when supported by tools like the Personal Style Indicator, these skills become second nature—enabling you to lead others the way they need to be led.

In our next article, we’ll explore:

• Skill 19: Questioning
• Skill 20: Listening

These two will take your communication effectiveness to the next level.

You’re building leadership from the inside out—stay with it. You’re transforming how you lead, one skill at a time. 🚀

Until next time, Keep Living On Purpose!

PS. Stay tuned to your opportunity to pre-register for the Online Transformational Leadership Course. That link will be available soon. To bench your (or others) leadership skills, access our Leadership Skills Inventory-Self or LSI-360′.

The post Transformational Leadership Series: Section Two — Interpersonal Communication Skills first appeared on CRG - Consulting Resource Group.

Welcome back to Section Two: Interpersonal Communication Skills in the Transformational Leadership Series. In our last article, we focused on what’s happening inside—self-disclosure and managing internal perceptions. Now, we turn outward to how you show up, how you are perceived, and how well you give others your full attention.

Whether you realize it or not, you are always communicating. Your posture, tone, words, dress, and focus—all of it sends a message. Great leaders don’t leave this to chance. They are intentional about the impression they create and the presence they offer.

In this article, we explore:

• Skill 15: Impression Management (External) — I skillfully manage the impression others have of me through effective use of language, appropriate attire, and professional demeanor, ensuring that my behavior aligns with the desired image I wish to convey.
• Skill 16: Attending — I demonstrate control and focus by giving my undivided attention respectfully to others, actively listening and engaging in the present moment.

Let’s dig in.

Skill 15: Impression Management (External) — Aligning Perception with Purpose

What This Means

You never get a second chance to make a first impression—but in leadership, it’s not just the first impression that matters. It’s every impression.

Impression management is the intentional alignment of your external presentation—your appearance, language, tone, behavior, and body language—with the professional image you want to project. It’s not about being fake. It’s about being consistent and congruent with your values and goals.

This skill is especially crucial in leadership because people form opinions of your credibility, competence, and trustworthiness in a matter of seconds.

Why It Matters

Perception shapes influence. People often decide whether they will follow you long before you say your first word.

Leaders who manage impressions well:

• Are seen as credible, confident, and capable
• Command respect without demanding it
• Consistently reflect professionalism in any environment

I recall an individual coming to CRG for an interview, for a marketing position. As soon as he walked in (before we even said hello and shook hands), I eliminated him from the position. Why? He looked awful. Hair ungroomed, clothes not ironed and personal hygiene much to be desired. Clearly he was not aware of – nor did he care about impression management.

When you manage your external image with integrity, you communicate leadership before you even speak.

How to Implement

1. Be Aware of Non-Verbal Cues: Your body language, posture, and eye contact all speak loudly. Use them intentionally.
2. Dress for Impact: Your appearance should match the environment and the expectations of those you’re leading. When in doubt, elevate your standard.
3. Use Language that Aligns with Who You Are: Speak with clarity and confidence. Avoid filler words and negative self-talk, especially in public settings.
4. Personal Hygiene and Appearance: Yes, brush your teeth, iron your clothes, wear clean cloths and have a shower!
5. Be Consistent Across Contexts: Your presence should reflect the same professionalism whether you’re on stage, in a Zoom call, or at a coffee shop with a colleague.
6. Being Appropriate: Sorry no rude jokes, foul language or demeaning comments. Just this week, I was at an event and the speaker constantly used foul language. Unfortunately, her expertise was voided because she did not manage her impression. But get this she was a brand development specialist – Ironic right!

When your external image aligns with your internal values, people trust you faster and follow you farther.

Skill 16: Attending — Giving the Gift of Full Attention

What This Means

Attending is the ability to be fully present with others—to listen with your body, mind, and heart. It’s about being intentionally attentive, not just hearing words, but truly engaging with the person in front of you.

In a world full of distraction, giving someone your undivided attention is both rare and powerful. And for a leader, it is a differentiator that builds trust and influence.

Why It Matters

People know when you’re truly present—and they know when you’re not. When a leader offers focused attention, it communicates:

• Respect and value
• Emotional safety
• Trustworthiness and care

Leaders who attend well build stronger teams, resolve conflict more effectively, and cultivate deep engagement.

How to Implement

1. Eliminate Distractions: Put away your phone, silence notifications, and close your laptop during conversations.
2. Use Intentional Body Language: Lean in, maintain eye contact, and use facial expressions that reflect understanding.
3. Mentally Commit to the Moment: Set aside other concerns and focus completely on the person or conversation in front of you.
4. Practice Patience: Don’t interrupt or rush people. Give them space to express themselves fully.

Attending is one of the simplest ways to increase your leadership impact—and one of the most overlooked. Mastering it sets you apart.

Final Thoughts: Show Up Intentionally, Lead Powerfully

Impression management and attending work hand-in-hand. One shapes how you’re perceived; the other shapes how others feel when they’re with you. Together, they enable you to:
✔ Project credibility and integrity
✔ Build connection and trust
✔ Lead with intentional presence

In our next article, we’ll expand your relational toolkit by diving into:

• Skill 17: Observing
• Skill 18: Suspending

These two will equip you to better understand others and lead with thoughtful discernment.

You’re building powerful momentum—keep going. 🚀

Until next time, Keep Living On Purpose!

PS. Stay tuned to your opportunity to pre-register for the Online Transformational Leadership Course. That link will be available soon. To bench your (or others) leadership skills, access our Leadership Skills Inventory-Self or LSI-360′.

The post Transformational Leadership Series: Section Two — Interpersonal Communication Skills first appeared on CRG - Consulting Resource Group.

Welcome to Section Two: Interpersonal Communication Skills—where transformational leadership shifts from inner mastery to relational impact. Now that you’ve laid a solid foundation with the 12 Self-Management Skills, it’s time to focus on how you connect, communicate, and build trust with others.

This section of the Transformational Leadership Series will equip you with 12 interpersonal communication skills that elevate how you show up, engage with others, and influence relationships with purpose and integrity.

We begin with two foundational skills:

• Skill 13: Self-Disclosure — I engage in appropriate self-disclosure by openly sharing my personal thoughts, beliefs, and feelings with others in a manner that builds trust and understanding.
• Skill 14: Image Management (Internal) — I actively manage and take responsibility for the internal images I create in my mind of myself and others, fostering a positive self-concept and nurturing a healthy perception of others.

Let’s begin your next level of leadership impact—where influence starts with openness and self-awareness.

Skill 13: Self-Disclosure — Building Trust Through Appropriate Openness

What This Means

Self-disclosure is the intentional act of sharing your inner world with others—your thoughts, feelings, experiences, and convictions—in a way that fosters trust and connection. When done appropriately, it humanizes your leadership, breaks down walls, and invites others to do the same.

This is not about over-sharing or making it about you. It’s about being authentic, vulnerable, and real—without being inappropriate or self-focused.

Why It Matters

Trust is the currency of leadership—and trust is built through authentic connection. When you appropriately disclose, people stop seeing you as a distant authority figure and start seeing you as a relatable human being.

Appropriate self-disclosure:

• Creates psychological safety
• Encourages reciprocal openness
• Builds emotional connection and deeper trust

It signals that you’re not hiding behind a leadership mask, and that you value transparency over image management.

How to Implement

1. Know What to Share and When: Share personal experiences that relate to the context and serve the relationship or goal—not just to vent or seek attention.
2. Be Honest but Measured: You can be open and still professional. Vulnerability isn’t about emotional dumping—it’s about strategic authenticity.
3. Model First: Often, people won’t open up until you do. Take the lead and invite connection through sincerity.
4. Use Self-Disclosure to Encourage Growth: Share your past struggles, lessons learned, or turning points to inspire or reassure others.
5. Pay Attention to Response: Healthy self-disclosure deepens dialogue. If it shuts others down, reassess tone or timing.

When done well, self-disclosure is a transformational leadership tool that turns surface-level interactions into genuine relationships.

Skill 14: Image Management (Internal) — Shaping the Way You See Yourself and Others

What This Means

Before you can lead others well, you must take control of the internal images you hold—how you see yourself and how you perceive others. These mental images directly influence your communication, confidence, empathy, and expectations.

Internal image management means refusing to cling to distorted self-perceptions or negative assumptions about others. It’s about being intentional in cultivating a healthy self-concept and a gracious, accurate view of those around you.

Why It Matters

You can’t lead what you don’t value—including yourself. Leaders who hold toxic images of themselves struggle with insecurity, defensiveness, or overcompensation. Likewise, distorted images of others lead to unfair assumptions, tension, and ineffective communication.

Managing your internal images helps you:

• Build unshakable self-confidence grounded in truth
• Give others the benefit of the doubt and increase empathy
• Lead without judgment or internal bias

Your inner picture determines your outer posture.

How to Implement

1. Audit Your Inner Dialogue: Notice how you talk to yourself. Are you affirming your worth and potential, or undermining it?
2. Challenge Mental Filters: Catch yourself when you assume negative intentions from others. Replace assumptions with curiosity.
3. Affirm Your Strengths and Progress: Regularly reflect on what you’re doing well—self-respect starts with self-awareness.
4. Visualize Healthy Relationships: Intentionally see others as capable, resourceful, and valuable—even when you disagree.
5. Reject Perfectionism: Give yourself and others permission to grow. No one thrives under constant inner criticism.
6. Complete CRG’s Self-Worth Inventory: This powerful assessment helps you confirm your confidence levels in Five Categories which benchmarks your perception of self. The is also an online course Unlock Your Confidence that goes in-depth on the application of the SWI.

Great leaders clean up their internal image first—because that’s the lens through which they lead.

Final Thoughts: Lead Authentically from the Inside Out

Self-disclosure and internal image management are powerful tools that elevate your leadership from mechanical to relational. Together, they help you:
✔ Build trust by being real
✔ Strengthen connection through vulnerability
✔ Lead others with fairness, empathy, and authenticity

As we continue this section, you’ll develop even deeper communication and relational skills—ones that build loyalty, enhance collaboration, and increase your influence.

In our next article, we’ll cover:

• Skill 15: Impression Management (External)
• Skill 16: Attending

Let’s keep building the leadership that others want to follow—starting with who you are and how you show up.

Until next time, Keep Living On Purpose!

PS. Stay tuned to your opportunity to pre-register for the Online Transformational Leadership Course. That link will be available soon. To bench your (or others) leadership skills, access our Leadership Skills Inventory-Self or LSI-360′.

The post Transformational Leadership Series: Section Two — Interpersonal Communication Skills first appeared on CRG - Consulting Resource Group.

Welcome back to the final article in Section One: Self-Management of our Transformational Leadership Series. So far, you’ve built an extraordinary foundation: grounding yourself, clarifying your purpose and beliefs, aligning your values, leveraging your strengths, setting clear goals, committing to lifelong learning, mastering priorities, and managing stress effectively.

Now we turn to two final, crucial self-management skills that sustain your energy and shape your mindset for the long journey of leadership success:

• Skill 11: Health Practices — Get optimum nutrition, exercise, deep relaxation, and restful sleep.
• Skill 12: Maintaining an Optimistic and Positive Mindset — Understand and control your responses and language to be optimistic and positive.

Let’s dive in and complete your self-management mastery.

Skill 11: Health Practices — Get Optimum Nutrition, Exercise, Deep Relaxation, and Restful Sleep

What This Means

Leadership requires energy. Yet too many leaders sacrifice their health in the pursuit of success, only to find themselves depleted and unable to sustain their impact.

Optimal health practices are not optional for transformational leaders—they are essential. Nutrition, exercise, rest, and relaxation are your fuel for sustained performance.

Our Stress Indicator & Health Planner (SIHP) assessment and the online course Dying To Live are invaluable tools for this skill as well. With 120 insightful questions across 5 wellness categories, SIHP gives you a clear benchmark of your current stress and health levels. It reveals where you’re thriving and where you need to take action. The course provides over 4 hours of video instructions and research to apply to this specific topic area.

Why It Matters

Your health is your leadership engine. Without proper maintenance, even the most talented leader risks burnout, brain fog, and emotional exhaustion.

Healthy leaders:

• Think clearly and make better decisions.
• Model vitality and balance for their teams.
• Sustain high performance over the long haul.

Simply put, when you feel better, you lead better.

How to Implement

1. Complete the Stress Indicator & Health Planner: Understand your current health benchmarks and where you need to improve. Consider registering and completing the Dying to Live online course based on this assessment.
2. Focus on the Fundamentals: Prioritize quality nutrition, regular exercise, restorative sleep, and daily relaxation.
3. Create Health Rituals: Build consistent health habits into your daily routine to reduce stress and boost energy.
4. Listen to Your Body: Pay attention to signs of fatigue or imbalance and respond proactively.
5. Engage in Continuous Improvement: Use your SIHP results to track progress and adjust your health practices over time.

Healthy leaders are resilient leaders. Investing in your health is an investment in your leadership longevity.

Skill 12: Maintaining an Optimistic and Positive Mindset — Understand and Control Your Responses and Language to Be Optimistic and Positive

What This Means

Leadership is as much about mindset as it is about skillset. Challenges will come. Setbacks are inevitable. But how you interpret and respond to these experiences shapes both your leadership effectiveness and your life satisfaction.

A positive, optimistic mindset is not about ignoring reality—it’s about choosing to focus on possibilities rather than problems.

Dr. Martin Seligman’s foundational work in Learned Optimism reveals that optimism is not just a natural trait—it’s a learnable skill. Optimistic leaders frame challenges as temporary and solvable, and they foster environments where others adopt the same outlook.

Why It Matters

Your mindset shapes your actions, and your actions shape your outcomes.

Optimistic leaders:

• Inspire confidence and resilience in their teams.
• See opportunities where others see obstacles.
• Persist through adversity with hope and determination.

Optimism fuels leadership that endures.

How to Implement

1. Study Learned Optimism by Dr. Martin Seligman: Understand how optimism is developed and how to reframe negative thinking patterns.
2. Monitor Your Language: The words you choose impact your mindset. Use positive, forward-focused language.
3. Reframe Challenges: View setbacks as temporary and specific, not permanent or personal.
4. Celebrate Progress: Recognize small victories to build momentum and maintain a positive outlook.
5. Surround Yourself with Positive Influences: Choose relationships and environments that reinforce optimism.

When you cultivate an optimistic mindset, you radiate energy and possibility, encouraging your team to do the same.

Final Thoughts: Sustain Your Leadership with Health and Optimism

You’ve now completed Section One: Self-Management of the Transformational Leadership Series. By focusing on health and mindset, you ensure that your leadership is not just effective—it’s sustainable.

These final two skills empower you to:

✔ Lead with energy and resilience.
✔ Maintain perspective and positivity, even under pressure.
✔ Create a ripple effect of optimism and vitality throughout your organization.

Leadership transformation is not just about external skills—it’s about how you manage and lead yourself daily.

In the next section of our series, we will shift to Interpersonal Leadership Skills, building on your self-management foundation to lead and influence others effectively.

You are well on your way to becoming a fully transformational leader. Stay with us—your leadership journey continues.

Until next time, Keep Living On Purpose!

PS. Stay tuned to your opportunity to pre-register for the Online Transformational Leadership Course. That link will be available soon. To bench your (or others) leadership skills, access our Leadership Skills Inventory-Self or LSI-360′.

The post Transformational Leadership Series: Section One — Self-Management Skills first appeared on CRG - Consulting Resource Group.